What No Mother Ever Wants to Hear

Did you read the latest that a judge has ordered that Britney Spears turn over custody of her children to Kevin Federline?

If not, I'm sure you have by now and frankly, my heart breaks for her and her boys.

Okay wait, hear me out. I know she's a wreck. I absolutely agree with the judge based on the stories I've read that her children are not safe with her. However, I have compassion for Ms. Spears.

In my opinion, this is a young woman who was not prepared to become an adult. If you think about it, she has been sexualized since she was a pre-teen and that's gotta mess with your head. It seemed like the moment she turned 21, she was reeling from all the choices and temptations that a celebrity has at their feet. (Remember that video in which she kills herself in a Vegas hotel room? That was before KFed!)

Choices and temptations can either overwhelm you, or you make them work to your advantage like Jennifer Lopez and Madonna did. Then again, they had childhoods. They built their careers as young women, not as children controlled by a mother and a manager.

But for Britney, adulthood has brought one tidal wave after another. Perhaps she thought that a husband and children would anchor her, that they would be the only people in this world who wouldn't want to live off of her. She probably did her best and we all know that at 21 years old, we don't exactly have the best judgment in men, jobs or money.

As for motherhood ... whether you're 15 or 51, you're always in over your head. You always make mistakes and say things you shouldn't have said. Even those of us who have postponed or changed careers to make our little people the center of our world, we secretly fear that one day we'll be found out. That someone will see that we're not perfect, or even close to perfect and because of it, they'll want to take our kids away.

So this custody development is just one more tidal wave crashing onto Britney. I hope she'll swim up to the top, take responsibility for her life and be the woman and mother she had at one time hoped to be.

Vaya con Dios, Britney.

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